A Retraction

I recently received a post from a reader that informed me that, “in her parts,” the Internet slang LMFAOL actually means “Laughing My Fat Ass Out Loud.” Said correspondent also confided that in the last three years or so, when she turned 55, the words fat and f*cking have begun rolling continuously around in her brain like marbles and frequently rolling off her tongue as well. She attributes this use of “the two ‘f’ words” with entering a freer, more “zestful” stage of her life. In addition she said she had mentally established an abbreviation pattern in her thinking—f1 for the fat and f2 for f*cking, which greatly helps economize her thinking and actually provides her with increased energy levels. She further suggested that I consider use of the f1 and f2 abbreviations in my blog, for instance, in a sentence composition such as “Most of the women at the party had f1 asses and most also wished that they had f2 asses but did not.”

I am no prude and do not have a problem with the message meaning underlying its semantic structure. However, I do object to the use of these crude acronyms. Lazy thinking leads to lazy writing, which is something I will not allow on herewith blog.

And further, compulsive use of these “f” words likely is caused not by newfound “zest” but due to a decline and impending shutdown of neural networks.

I obediently accept the correction that some in some parts might intend the term LMFAOL to refer to f1 and not f2 asses. (We can leave to future editors of the Merriam Webster dictionary to scientifically determine the widespreadness of this usage.)

However, I will not allow a debasement of this blog’s raison d'etre—to encourage clear and direct thinking, which is expressed in clear and direct writing.